Josh's Bar Mitzvah Toast

Here's what I said when I got up to make a toast at my son's (Josh) Bar Mitzvah. Josh loves astronomy, so we decorated the reception room with that theme.

Hi everybody! How’s everybody like "The Mansion"? Great isn’t it? Everybody’s so accommodating.

I told them I was concerned everyone should have enough space. Look around the room. You think they got a little carried away?

I’d like to thank everybody, including the Rabbi, our relatives, and our friends for sharing Josh’s Bar Mitzvah with us. Some came a long distance. As far away as VT, FL and WA state. Any further and you’d need a Visa!

Most of all I want to thank Wendy. Thank G-d for Wendy. Not only did she make the arrangements to make this day possible, but she also had something to do with making Josh possible.

Wendy and I are very glad you can join us for this special day. Unfortunately, my parents aren’t able to make the trip due to circumstances beyond their control.
But they wanted to be here and participate so much that they wrote a note, and I’d like to share with you.

You know, I just remembered something about my mom. I don’t think she really understands astronomy. In college, I was fascinated by black holes. But every time I’d talk about them at home my mother would blush. Why would mentioning black holes make anybody blush? Anyway, here’s their note.

(read parent's note)

Well Josh, you’ve certainly come a long way. You went from being afraid to get in the pool as a baby, to being on a competitive swim team.

You went from suffering bullies, to a few weeks away from your black belt test.

You get straight A’s,
you’re on the Principal’s Honor Roll,
you’re in the accelerated enrichment program at school,
just made 1st Class in Boy Scouts on your way to Eagle,
and just did a great job on your Bar Mitzvah.

What I want to know is, whose kid are you anyway?

Josh is one sharp cookie, and I know he’ll do well whatever life he chooses.

So, I’d like you all to raise your glass for a toast to the man of the hour:

Josh… may you know yourself, be yourself, and love yourself,
and seek experience
enough to know
what you love
and where you’re strong,
and make a path
that will take you to both.

Lachiem!